


Lost At Sea

by DistantConstellations



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Allusions to Spoilers, Character Study, Introspection, M/M, Mentions of Most of PT, Set During Casino
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-19
Updated: 2017-08-19
Packaged: 2018-12-17 03:55:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11843469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DistantConstellations/pseuds/DistantConstellations
Summary: Akechi thinks, and thinks, but in the end, he goes nowhere.After all, he's already made his choice.





	Lost At Sea

**Author's Note:**

> "If you're stranded at sea, it's important to not drink saltwater, no matter how tempting it looks. You'll only die quicker in the end.  
> But oh.  
> It's so, so blue."

Some part of him, Akechi thinks, is always standing at the bow of that ship.  
Nevermind that he is here, at the precinct headquarters, in body if not spirit - there's always that swaying sensation of the ship breaking (red, dead) waves, of a wind not blowing a breeze so much as buffeting back in a futile resistance. Even when he's resting, he's in the Metaverse.  
There's a sense of frustration that accompanies it - of a twilight that never ends, an almost, maybe, it's-not-quite-time.

His cell rings, its gentle chime doing nothing to soothe his restless feelings. He takes a couple of seconds to compose himself before answering.

"You shouldn't be taking so long to answer my calls. My time is precious. Don't waste it."

  
There's an acrid taste in his mouth where a sarcastic reply lies on his tongue.  
(Your complaining wastes more time than anything.)  
But he hasn't gotten this far to trip up on something stupid like an inconsequential comment.

  
"Of course, I apologize," he manages to say, not quite smiling.

  
He's not naturally patient, but he's a savant at stewing in hate, so he swallows down the bitter feeling and waits.

 

Whether he likes it or not, he thinks of that sea, and he remembers the eerie silence of a hull slicing through Tokyo, the gap where something - anything - should be. But there is only him. Alone on the deck, as everyone enjoys their indolent pastimes inside, and he is once again set apart.

(He pointedly does not think of the aroma of coffee and the sound of aged wood creaking as he sits. Nor does he recall a devilish smile, soft hands passing warm cups, or the even warmer sense of belonging in his gut.)

_"Akechi? You seem out of it. Do you need to swap out?" Panther's voice snaps him back into the present, where they've been making progress into Sae's palace. Her gaze is sure and steady, concern bleeding into her voice, and Akechi finds himself wishing she hadn't called him out on his inattention._

_"Ah, no. Just distracted for a moment. I won't hold you back, don't worry." He's eager to move on. He feels exposed and it shows, words clipped and low. Panther nods, and Akechi is sure she's misunderstood._

_"No one ever said you were, plus there's no shame in getting tired! It means you've been working hard!" she beams, pumping her fist up to encourage him. The noise brings Oracle trotting over, obviously sniffing out mischief._

_"Tired?" Oracle looks over Akechi once, eyes lingering on his impatient expression. She snickers, amused. "Pfft, is the newbie already burnt out? We're barely anywhere on this floor!"_

_"What? No, I'm fine."_

_"You don't look fine," Skull pipes in, grinning lopsidedly as he rests his arm on Oracle's head. She immediately swats him off, frowning._

_"I'm confident I'll be more effective here than you, Skull," Akechi snips back, drawing himself up._

_"Put your money where your mouth is, big shot!" Oracle interrupts, slipping between the two, as she points in the direction of a corridor where Shadows surely lurk._

_"Gladly! I won't run from a challenge."_

_"Do they always have to be so confrontational?" he hears Queen sigh to Noir, as he turns to see them shaking their heads. He pauses._

_Noir notices, and looks at him head on, laughter in her eyes, "The energy is infectious, no?" It is. He finds himself laughing, but on the edge of his mind is the fact that this is temporary. The cold fact makes him shiver, trickling down his back and weighing down his steps._

Yes, he is always on that deck, nevermind the smiling faces around him, Oracle's laughter bubbling as he misses despite his boasting, Skull's firm shoves that move him when he's in over his head but too stubborn to guard.

Nevermind that sense of camaraderie, he knows where he belongs.

 

He recalls horror stories of men stranded at sea, constantly being beaten by the sun with no reprieve, dying of thirst. Akechi feels a kinship with them. He knows all too well what it's like to be surrounded by water,-

_"Akechi, you're welcome to stay as long as you want. It's no trouble."_

-to want, desperately,-

_Joker's shoulder, firm and warm under his glove, anchoring him as he leans over to peek in the chest._

-but not be able to take a drink.

 

It'll only make it hurt more, in the end. He shouldn't indulge in such a temporary relief. He has goals of his own, and he’s already decided their worth. Their cost. He clenches his hand around his mask where it sits in his hand, still.

"Is something wrong?" Joker asks, slowing so as to not leave Akechi behind. The others have already gone on without them. Akechi smiles, and shakes his head, softly.

"I only need a moment, I suppose."

"You know I'm here if you need me," Joker says, hesitant to leave him be. Akechi's smile lingers, leaving no room for arguments.  
As Joker's coat swirls around him (black currents around his ankles, pulling him down- ) and he walks away, all Akechi can hear is the sound of waves.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you angeler for reading my Extremely Rough Drafts and finished product and everything in between. You the real MVP.
> 
> Hope you guys liked it! I know it was rather short and not very romantic, but I wanted to get a better understanding of Goro's personality before wrangling with my other pieces....  
> Next work is in editing and will hopefully be up before September, but no guarantees. Sorry;;
> 
> Of course, feel free to cry about Goro (and especially Shuake) with me on twitter @acharmingcrow.


End file.
